Poema a la tortuga

me gustaría vivir

como una tortuga

siempre en la agua

bailando en el mar

acaba de dar a luz

en la arena

para vivir otra vez

hasta tengo cientos de años

más sabia que todos los del hombre

fuerte y tranquila

viviendo en un mundo azul

un mundo de paz

porque te estoy llevando

a través del corazón del cosmos

con el mundo en mi espalda

Reunited

Hello again.

We've passed by each other often. You may have seen me. I've certainly seen you. You're too captivating to ignore. You're too beautiful. The mere sight of you fills me with needy desire, but for a time I could not approach you. You were cold and unreceptive, agonizingly unaware of those that love you, that need you.

It was only a matter of waiting. I can be patient. I can wait for you. I'll ignore my impatience, time and again, just to be with you.

Today, waiting was no longer necessary. I returned from my journey through the gray and the rain, to find that you were warm again. The summer months have pulled you from the chill, and the warm fingers of the sun have thawed each trace of cold. You welcome me with open arms. Your beauty is unbearable, but now I can embrace you.

You're cold at first, but I am able to adapt. Every step forward, you pull me deeper, creeping up from my feet, to my knees, to my hips. When I can stand it no longer, I fall into you, until you have all of me. Until I am part of you.

The embrace is shocking, but familiar. You know my body well. I have reunited with the lover that knows me like no one else. Every touch is ecstasy, an addiction so powerful that I dream of never leaving.  Wrap yourself around me, and do not let me go. I would not think of resisting you.

I cannot stay forever, but I know you'll be here another day. You'll wait for me, as I have waited for you. My patient, immortal lover. My sea.

Believing in nothing

"You don't believe in anything?"

"¿No crees en nada?"

When the topic of religion comes up, and I declare my lack thereof, I've been asked both these questions. To me, though, there is a distinction between the phrasing of the English question and of the Spanish one. In Spanish, the question is this: you believe in nothing?

I must ponder. What does it mean, exactly, to believe in nothing?


I feel as though the question itself is creating a stigma. Of course, I know that the question is asked in regards to belief in a deity. The word nothing, however, carries a much more powerful meaning to it. It brings to mind nihilism, psychopathy, anarchy, darkness, emptiness. A world without morals, beauty, order, or light. A world of nothing.


If I don't believe in a god, then what can I say I believe in? No, I don't "believe" in science. Science is the means of gathering of empirical data, of observing phenomena and acquiring knowledge. Science is a structural, logical process that is not subject to the whims of belief. Logically, when it comes to science, there is nothing to believe in.

But there's that word again, nothing. To not believe in a god seems to imply a lack of belief in anything. Does logic, reason, and objectivity strip the atheist of the ability to find beauty in life? As science slowly peels away the mysteries of the universe, does this strip us of our ability to find wonder in it? If science tells you that love is merely a chemical process of your brain, does that make your passion any less fervent?

I would argue that, the more we discover about the universe, the more complex and mysterious it becomes. There is nothing wrong with believing in a higher power in order to explain these mysteries, but nor does a lack of a higher power mean there is nothing. I would argue, in fact, that the discerning scientist may see more beauty in the universe, the more it's studied.

You have the theist, who believes that the complex universe was crafted by sentient, benevolent hands. The belief that there is a higher power who crafted billions of unique personalities is, frankly, quite mind boggling. But then, so is the idea that no such being exists, and that is where things become much more beautifully complicated.

If we are to appreciate the existence of life as it is now, then we must throw our minds back to life's inception: the Big Bang. Fast forward billions of years, to the creations of stars and solar systems. Our small, relatively unremarkable star, born in chaos 4.57 billion years ago. From this tumultuous event came dust, materials that slowly accreted together to form planets, moons, and asteroids. Somehow, in those younger years of the solar system, when everything was much more violent, this pale blue dot we call Earth was lucky enough to survive.

Then there is the fact that Earth was positioned in that narrow strip called the habitable zone. Pushed too far in, Earth could've become another Venus, a landscape scorched with magma and intense heat. Pushed too far out, Earth could've become another Mars, a barren desert too cold to hold onto life for very long.

Finally, placed in the habitable zone and protected from an onslaught of meteors partially by our gas giant big brothers, Earth was in a position to cultivate life. Complex life, able to withstand the many unique landscapes that Earth contains, from the lush green forests to the icy kingdoms.

Somehow, out of all these circumstances needed for life to grow, sentience emerged. Human beings evolved into creatures with brains that contain more neurons than stars in the universe. Diverse, complex minds that are able to create language, music, and question reality. Crafty hands that are able to put a world of information in the palm of your hand or send machinery into outer space.

When I contemplate all the circumstances it took for sentient life to emerge, I am left stunned at the enormity of existence. This is not nothing. This is the appreciation of everything.


The Earth is an incredibly small planet, nothing but a piece of driftwood in an ocean. On it, there lives seven billion people. Seven billion people, each with their own unique backstory, fingerprint, thoughts, and ideals. We are incredibly small, and in the scale of the universe, we are not even electrons. But we have the ability to look upon the stars, and question the enormity of it all.

Humans are pieces of star dust, the remnants of the accretion disk that formed our planet billions of years ago. We are not simply part of the universe, we are the universe. Humanity is simply the universe becoming self aware.

In short, logic does not strip away the ability to appreciate beauty, but only facilitates it. It is not accurate to say that I, nor any other atheist, believe in nothing. I believe in the universe. I believe in life.

Where are you?

Where are you?

You are here.

In a land cradled by the palm of a gentle ocean. Its blue fingers stretch to a limitless horizon, melting and streaming upwards into the sky. You are encased in an azure jewel. The sky towers above at a height with no end, and the sea basks in its glow and reflects its color. They are one in the same, a blue giant with a warm smile and strong, chilly hands.

You are here.

You stand at the precipice of ruins, balancing between two eras of time. Below you, the city is a clean metropolis of modern architecture and winding streets. Above you, the fortress of a time that has long since passed.

You encounter two different scents. The fortress is the smell of damp, elderly stone, of a time that has laid to rest. Immovable and solid, the rock bears the mark of history. The second scent is that of the ocean, salty and fresh. The waves are reborn and renewed each day, forever shifting the sands and shaping the earth.

One unyielding and old, a testament to time. One constantly moving, a testament to a life that's always changing.

You stand between the past and the present. Where will you go?

You are here.

The streets are the pulse of youth, filled with lights, laughter, and action. At all times, history towers above them, but this is not a place of the past. History is remembered, but it is not lived. This is not a place of nostalgia, where the people look back to books that have been closed. 

Instead, this place is filled with movement. The people have their eyes set forward, to the horizon of unending possibilities. They live here, their feet in the present but their minds in the future. It is a time of progress and change, where the voices of laughter and happiness are equal to the voices demanding to step forward.

In these fearless streets you live, beneath a glowing sun and before an endless ocean. Beneath a fortress of time and before an unpredictable future. Step now, into the boulevards of liveliness. Step now, into soft sand. The city welcomes you.

Where are you?

You are here, in Alicante.

You are living now.

Video and pictures

Swanky youtube video

I made a video! It's a scholarship video for USAC.

Here's a link to my Picasa account, as well, for those that will be interested in viewing my travel pictures: http://picasaweb.google.com/100225393207163959131

Happy trails!

Upcoming adventures

It seems that I've forgotten about this blog for quite a while. Last summer, I studied abroad in Prague and traveled to eight different countries. Rather than using the internet, I used a small little travel journal that fit conveniently in my purse, recording my thoughts at a whim. A travel blog seemed to have no purpose to me then.

However, this coming January, I'll be studying abroad in Spain for four months. When that time comes, I'm going to use this blog as a means to record adventures, thoughts, and observations. I have always enjoyed writing. I just need the motivation to keep writing, and I think Spain will do that for me, as it did before.

I'm in love with Spain, and I'm counting down the days until I arrive.

Hasta enero.

Madrid, Day Five, June 28th.

Today, we visited the city of Segovia, the proud owner of the Roman aqueduct. It was mind-boggling to learn that this piece of architecture had been standing for over two thousand years, that it was still useable and had no mortar to support it. The Romans were amazing engineers, and I wonder if we would be capable of the same feat, even with modern technology. They certainly don't make buildings like they used to, and the Roman aqueduct is a primary example of brilliance of ancient architects.

While not quite as amazing, but equally as interesting, was the Alcázar castle. It was built by Muslims, but by the end of the 11th century, it was conquered by King Alfonso VI. What I find fascinating is the fact that Muslims were in Spain for centuries before the Spaniards reconquered the kingdom and essentially banished them. I was previously unaware of the heavy Arabic influence in Spain, and I find their conflict in history to be very interesting.

Like with the Palacio Real, the Alcázar had beautiful decorations inside, and many rooms that held suits of armor and old war weapons. It housed many kings and queens during its time, and is quite the important monument in history. It's hard to say which piece of construction I found to be the most interesting in Segovia, but I would probably have to choose the Alcázar, given all the things that occurred within it. I'm also very interested in the history between the Spaniards and the Muslims, and the warfare that occurred between them. Spain is a country filled with rich history, and Segovia is obviously a very historical city. I enjoyed learning about the great Roman architectures and the story behind the Alcázar.

Always a lover of medieval history, I was especially thrilled about the interior of the Alcázar, with its suits of armor, weaponry and artistic rooms. I also enjoyed the city of Segovia itself. Despite some of its modern stores, it seemed like a very historical city, similar to Toledo with its small, narrow streets that no car can pass through. I loved learning about the history of the old architectures, and hope to discover more in my class in Bilbao.